That one song.

Well this blog is about that one song we all are stuck at. That one song which makes all the little butterflies in your body go happy. Well I ll tell you my story. I m already in love with this blog.  
Yesterday my MP3 player was fucked up.
Why? Well, you see,  It just hanged and played only one song half of the day.
And that is when I felt billion emotions listening to that song.
Anyway, as I was riding my scooty way to home, I listened  to my mp3 player and all it played was that one song. I was :| and it was totally annoying since we
talked about that person earlier at Trusha's house. 
Thank God I reached home before another song played. I was feeling feverish as well so I just lied on my bed and eased my fever off. It was all a WTF  feeling. You get me ?
That  lyrics of that song made me nostalgic about all the events taking place in my life.
I am really haunted with this song and I want to hear this everyday and it makes me feel so happy even if that
someone abandoned me.. Do i seem pitiful? ahaha but really, this is a feel good song that when you are sang with
this, it would make you feel weak and run back again to the person you love  themost. This is so true, one word from
him, i think i would run back to him while I m listening to this song.
But you know what ? This is okay. This is something you smile and let the all the feelings feel emotional. Not that i miss everything. Just that I dont regret any second in my past.To say that I've let my feelings get the best of me would be an understatement. The head versus heart battle inside me is so one-sided that if it wasn't thankfully keeping me alive and functioning, I'm sure
my brain would have detached itself days ago.
I know to a certain extent, I need to not let things get to me as much as they do. But I really enjoy the aspect of my personality that allows me to find a deeper meaning in simple things. May it be the lyrics and music of a very unknown song to me.It's
because of that I'm able to love myself and love people around me so much.Infact love everything in my life so much .
This is just me being sassy about how I've always been the sensitive type. Whether or not that's a good       
thing or a bad thing is beside the point, but I felt like addressing it the best way I know how to.
All I want to say that breathe all the happiness and emotions the song can give you. They are the simple pleasures of life.
The song is Pehli baar mohobbat ki hai -Kaminey.
Favourite lines :-
Aankhein doobi doobi si surmayee madham,
Jheelen paani paani hai bass tum aur hum,
Hmmm baat badi hairat ki hai,
Pehli baar mohabbat ki hai,
Aakhiri baar mohabbat ki hai.

Eventually , everything will connect.

So do you think the universie fights for two souls to be together ? No na. Then why will destiny and fate decide this? Its you who has to decide. Rest will take care.
"What's the world's greatest lie?... It's this: that at a certain point in our lives, we lose
control of what's happening to us, and our lives become controlled by fate."
Its you who has to make an effort to bring back or let go. Its your take on it.
Its not about being fake. Its not about the pain inside. Its not about time heal. Its not about forever. Its about realising how your love and respect vanishes in a single day. How terrible can our souls be ? 
Its about realisation
that some people are a part of your history, but not a part of your destiny."
And please Destiny is not in your hand. Future is not in your hand. The only thing that can be controlled by you is your mind, your way to get out of it or get back to it.
Somethings are too strong to be coincidences.
And one day you will be grateful that things didn't work out the way you wanted them to.
"I've witnessed,... the gradual collapse of
my life, the slow foundering of all I wanted to be... Fate has always tried to make me love or want things just so that it could show me, on the very next day, that I didn't have and could never have them."
It's not about fooling yourself. Its about respecting your feelings. It may take time to get over but you are stronger than you think you are only if you want to be.
Cause may be the reason of the event might not be accepatable to you now , bt rather some day later in near future. Wait for that sunrise.

You never know when the bus is coming.

I love being horribly straightforward. I love sending reckless text messages and telling people I love them and telling people they are absolutely magical humans and I cannot believe they really do exist. I love saying, "Kiss me" and "You're a good person," and, "You brighten my day" or "I miss him." I live my life as straightforward as possible.                     
Because one day, I might get hit by a bus.                                      
Maybe its weird. Maybe its scary.
But there is nothing more beautiful than being Honest.
There's nothing wrong in accepting you miss him when he's no more in your life, also there's nothing wrong to get up and get stronger.     
I am not saying that everything is survivable .. Just that everything except the last thing is. Being adamant and stubborn may not be in your hand but what you want from life should be Clear in your mind. This happens. Cause you dont want to ruin your and somebody else's life. Its okay. It really is. Let go cause its tough to do so. Not to prove but to be in peace.
The world may be broken but hope is not crazy.                   
We are young and we are human and we are beautiful and we are not as in control as we think we are. We never know who needs us back. We never know what miracle might happen.                           We never know when the bus is coming.

I'm a mess.

I m a mess
I m so lost as of now.
I m caught between two contradicting
emotions without the ability to decide which
is in the right.
Do you love me? Do you care? Why should I
love you? Why should I care?
I shouldnt—I know that—but here I am; lost
without you; wondering if you think of me
nowadays; running over every what-if there is;
and of crying myself to sleep.
I dont think you deserve my love and the time
Ive given you, but I cant help it. You could love me like nobody else could.
I'm still in love with you somehow.  I never thought this, but
here I am. I know things werent, arent, and
will never be right, but you were my first real
love.
"And boy i did love you."
But its seemingly over. I've changed.
Everything's changed. I can't love you.
Even if you tried I don't know if we can be
friends.
I'm anxious. So anxious. I ve no idea of life.Totally dependent on destiny taking me out somewhere atleast.
Loving you was the best thing ever happening to me.
It concerns me that you have no idea just how
FUCKING GORGEOUS YOU ARE. INSIDE AND
OUT.I adore the things you keep trying to hide when you sang to me.
Your audios are the only thing playing on my cellphone and on myself too.
:) Here I m.A big mess of feelings. In the middle of the night.
And I m an utter mess over a boy.
Does he know how much I think of him? Does
he know how much I hate him? Does he know how much I once yearned to hear from him?
Does he know how emotionless I feel?
Hurt? Hateful? Foolish?
Its sad. I don't know what's sadder: realizing
your love can disintegrate so quickly for
someone or that their's can.I really did love you.
But now? I dont work that way.
I know it hasnt been that long and I shouldnt
come to harsh conclusions so quickly but its
just that..
It has been that long.
That much has changed.
I've been hurt.
And I won't forget.
Because we never do, do we? I'm caught
between two contradicting emotions: love
and hate. Im caught between two places: that
of continuing to love you and that of giving a
definite goodbye. Im caught between two
sets of memories; those were I felt you loved
me and those were I felt slighted by your hand.
I don't know if you'll ever see this. Half of me
hopes you do. The other hopes you never
hear from me again.
But. If you are.
And if you care.
I'd get my shit together because I'm halfway
gone.
The question isn't whether you care for me or
not—I've made up my mind for the most part
in regard to that—its whether you're the
person I thought you were and have the guts
to speak the truth.
may be i leave this for time to heal. Or waiting for a miracle to happen to my feelings.